As a father or mother, parents have many expectations from their child, or they made their mind beforehand, what they want their son or daughter to be, especially if the family have doctors, engineers their new ones are expected to go in the same path and that’s the same with many other occupation. Previously the options were limited for the jobs, so people do not care much about their passion and neither encourage their own children for the same. But now with lots of options it’s rather confusing for the children too to choose and go in the right direction on their own, so it is a crucial responsibility for the parents to help their children find the right path. Parents can ask the children to make a list of the things they love to do and want to know more about them, they can keep a track of the time spent by the children in the activities to help them find their right passion.
But most of the parents fail to understand their child’s strength and weakness, their likes, dislikes. Ever we as a child wanted many things for ourselves, only if we were lucky enough, or only if we had the opportunities as today, our lives would have been different. But still we can make a better world for our children. Every child is different, and they grow up with different natural talents. Some children discover their talents at an early stage but for many it takes time to find out their natural strength. Obviously, children are not born talented, even if some are there that is an exceedingly small fraction, for the rest with constant observation and guidance from the parents, the children are able to find their strength or passion. Every child grows in a specific environment, so they has a specific talent but how parents can find out about their child’s passion or know their child’s talent so that they can help them find the right path. Choosing a passion does not always mean to choose one particular job rather parents should educate the child about the different options available when they are acquiring a passion for them. Here are few tips that help to find out your child’s passion:
Observe & Learn:
Once your child starts understanding things and doing activities you need to observe them closely without being overwhelmed, because as they grow up they may want to do many things or live a different dream every day, as there is a sea of opportunities to choose from, which most likely may be under the influence of what they see around them, they may like dancing because their friend do the same or may be join the football team as most of their friends are joining. But parents should try to understand what’s their child’s true strength is, rather than their child’s interests. The interests may change every day, but whatever is their true strength will remain same and parents need to nurture that and let them enjoy without forcing them or burdening them to do any such thing.
Learning about your child while observing them doing the things they take interest in and trying to understand what they want and how they feel about that is especially important. A child’s passion can be their strengths, be it a good voice or a good speaking skill or can be even playing with robots or mechanical stuffs and opening them up and destroying the toy in the process etc, but may be that can be your child’s passion, observe them and learn about them. Only by learning about their skills and what they are curious in doing will help you choose a right path for their future. Your child’s curiosity and engagement will be essential for choosing their passion; they should enjoy doing whatever they choose.
Communication & Encouragement:
Once you have learned by observing your child, your next step should be communicating and encouraging them. Please understand communication is a two way process, while communicating with your child you need to be a good listener too, only good listeners are good speakers, otherwise your child might not be able to open up completely in front of you. In maximum household, listening to a child is not that much important. They are always told what need to be doing, they cannot decide and hence they might feel that they have no control to change anything in their life. It has a strong impact in their future decision making which in the long run make many unhappy children, we will discuss about that later. For understanding how your child processes the thoughts, you have to be their best friends and try to listen to everything they have to say. Now a day, many families are adopting such techniques to understand their child, so that their child can grow exponentially with their dreams. You may find out your child’s passion in a better way if you listen to them carefully.
Communication is an important key, you have to communicate with your children and guide them to keep working with their natural talents and strengths, your encouragement will also play a major role for them to take up those talents seriously and start working on them with full interest and motivation. Your communication with your children has a great impact on them, try to be simple with the choice of your words and give true and practical reasoning, so that they can understand properly. As children love to be praised, try to praise them for their work in a constructive way for e.g. instead of saying “Your painting skill is better than your dancing, no need to join dance class”, try saying “Wow! You have such artistic skills; you can do better and earn awards if you learn more” which will encourage them to a great extend to develop their natural skills. While you encourage you must remember to give them some constructive criticism too in a friendly and caring way, which will help them build their good character. That will help your children to learn how they will deal both success and failure in a positive way.
Challenge & Engage:
Parenting is not at all easy and it is not a one-time job, it is a lifetime job, which never ends. So, once you figure out what your child is good at and listen to what they have to say, your job is to help them keep their focus right. As we have discussed earlier with the limitless opportunities and the changing interests of the children, it might be confusing for your children to decide practically and it would be rather tough for them to stick to what they started with. It’s always a good habit to have more than one hobby or interest, to learn new skills, it helps them to open up themselves to many possibilities but at the same time focusing on their passion is also important. So, you must keep challenging them to develop their skill-set and increase their involvement and curiosity in their passion. Parents can design games or set up some tasks to challenge and nurture the talents of their child. At times, their interest might change, so take the process slow, do not jump into any conclusion. Let them choose accordingly.
Parents should also try to engage themselves with their children that will give them support and a will to proceed with their passion. Take them to events where they can showcase their talents and parents can arrange a healthy competition with their friends to understand their growth and rather make a fun event to engage them with their passion, but never let the result of the competition make them lose their hopes. Always teach them to take the results of any competition optimistically, as a constructive criticism and an opportunity to learn from their own mistakes. Let them make mistakes and learn that will implement the optimistic character in them naturally.
Finding a Mentor:
As they start showing developments in their talents and you can see growth and an urge to learn more in your children, if your knowledge is not sufficient in that field, which may not be in all the time, find a good mentor for them to help them grow more in their own field of interests. The regular studies they receive from school may not be enough as it is regular and same for all. The talent of your child is unique and therefore a mentor for them is very much needed to help develop them in their quest to learn more. A mentor can motivate them with the practicalities of the talents or skills your child has and develop their decision-making capabilities in the field of their passion to have clear goals which will help them to move ahead with their passion in future and they will be more informed while taking the right decisions in future with the practical knowledge they acquire.
To find the right mentor for your kid you must focus on some important factors like the person should be trustworthy and should have good principles. The person should be experienced with handling children and should be good in the field in which your child is interested in. Parents might appoint a mentor or can help their child to connect with other people who are good in that field. Parents may not be able to explain how a motor works but taking the child to a mechanic shop can help them get a clear picture.
Develop Entrepreneurial skills:
Practical knowledge is especially important but if they cannot apply their talents in their day to day life to develop their future, or say earn their living, it will be of no use. At the end if your passion does not feed you what would be its use or say you have developed your passion and you are very good in it , but you have to do something else to earn your living, how can that be helpful to you right. So, parents with the help of the mentors should help their children to develop some entrepreneurial skills so that they can be self-dependent and be prepared for the harsh realities of life. By developing such skills they can accomplish their goals in reality, they will develop persistence to continue their goal despite the problems and obstacles in life, they will be able to take the risks. They can achieve tolerance and resilience to come out of tough situations and they will be more reasonable and resourceful in order to be successful with their goals .This skills can be achieved by arranging a friendly meeting with a successful entrepreneur or their role models or reading about them and knowing their story of becoming an entrepreneur or the struggles they face to become what they are, participating in debates, webinars and creating projects with their own ideas, planning their own daily chores. You can help them in decision-making process.
Keeping up with the World:
Till now we have discussed the possibilities to find your child’s passion but there can be some exceptions or say problems while transforming the child’s passion into future goals. The options are increasing every day, many new talents can be developed by your child which you might not be aware of if you do not keep observing them and does not keep yourselves updated about the possibilities. Always remember never focus too much in one topic or one field, it might make your child lose interest, or they might start searching for an escape from your continuous pressure. With the presence of electronic devices at home and mobile phones in everyone’s hand, there would be diversion of interests. At some time, they would like to have one for themselves. If they see you engaged in your phone or laptop always that is going to affect them, and they might want to follow the same. So, changing your own habits would be necessary or proper reasons and timing for the same should be set. But still if it becomes inevitable to change or it become necessary to spend more time in electronic devices, parents should try to make that productive by focusing what their child like to do in their smart phones. The smart phone can be used to develop their natural talents by showing informative videos or constructive games and registering for tutorials. If your child enjoys what they do they will be able to use their thinking properly and learn better from those activities. They should find interest while searching for their passion.
Raising a happy Child:
Raising a successful child is only possible when he/she will be happy with what they pursue as their passion and not being forced by their parents or mentors. Strong passion need enthusiasm and that will be present in the kid only you can help them explore more in the area but pressurizing in following one particular pursuit, while the child is not enjoying it will only make a child frustrated and that may result in anxiety and depression because of the expectation of their parents which is not at all acceptable. Parents should rather let their child learn and try doing things that excite them naturally and that will make them happy. Raising a happy kid does not mean you will allow them to do whatever they want to do, but after listening to them properly try to tackle things in an optimistic way, if it is ok to allow them what they need you can allow, if not then discuss it with them in a warm manner and try to give the appropriate reason why you cannot allow. The pressure to fulfil parent’s expectation can disrupt child’s proper growth and create unhealthy and unnecessary competition between siblings and classmates which may result into an unhappy situation. Despite scolding them or forcing them, talk to them and educate them. An optimistic and happy child can successfully achieve their goal and do better with their life.
Finding the right league:
Networking or socializing is also important to develop confidence among your child, which in the long run help them find their passion. Help them find out their friends who can influence them in a better way and share same interests or passions. Parents can arrange play dates, or meet other parents in school to know about other children who read with their child. The kids should network with people with whom they feel happy discussing their ideas and thoughts, as the encouragement they get from their friends will help them be more serious with their passion. Meeting other kids with different ideas will help them develop knowledge and they will be motivated, and it will be fun for them to work it out with their friends. Parents should help their kid develop a social circle, child with no friends suffer more from mental traumas and emotional breakdowns later in life. The relation between parents and child should be accepting, respectful and of loving nature, which will help them later in making friends. By having a healthy social circle, they may develop their social skills which help them to negotiate in difficult situations, co-operate with others and communicate or rather solve problems easily. Children tend to learn better or take more interest in activities or constructive projects when they have their friends with them doing the same work.
Success is not final:
Parents need to remember and teach their kids that their child will not be successful only by winning a contest or two , but even after failing the contest when the kid will not give up on their goal and passion rather become more motivated to work on their weakness and do even better the next time. Success is a continuous process and is cannot be one good ending but many good and bad endings .At the end, parents need to prepare their little one for any inevitable circumstances and raise them healthy and happy for them to grow and find success in their passion.
To sum it up all what points you need to remember is as follows:
- Observe & Learn: Learning about your child while observing them.
- Communication & Encouragement: Communication with your child and listening to their thoughts and encouraging them.
- Finding a Mentor: Finding the right mentor for your children.
- Develop Entrepreneurial skills: Teaching your child some entrepreneurial skills by letting them test their own decision-making capability.
- Keeping up with the World: Updating you and your family with the changing world.
- Raising a happy Child: Helping your child to get a happy atmosphere.
- Finding the right league: Finding right friends for your child.
- Success is not Final: Teaching them success is a continuous process.
While helping your children find their passion, parents should always remember about the physical and mental limits of their child. Parents should keep their expectations low, have patience and allow their child to explore variety of activities. When the child finds its interest in a particular activity, you can see the spark in your child while doing the same. You can never predict what your child is going to choose and also they might change what they chose once , never lose hope encourage them to do what they do better and help them in whatever way possible and support them to have their freedom of choice . Build the sense of purpose in your child which will give a meaning to their passion, having a purpose will give the child a bigger goal. Teach your child the art of living, being gentle and being responsible while enjoying their freedom, teach them nothing is final and life goes on, teach them perseverance, once they have you as a support and know how life goes on. With your dedication and proper guidance, they will be able to choose the right passion for them and go a long way in their life.